19 June 2015
Summer Solstice. Summer Soltice week. I’m hating the fucking sunshine. So bright. Peering into all my nooks and crannies. It shouldn’t be light. It shouldn’t be bright. The fucking birds shouldn’t be chirping. Little kids shouldn’t be riding their stupid bicycles and playing their stupid games out on the street.
It’s trying to draw me in. But I won’t go–I know it’s all a con. This sham of light and brightness–when life is not like that at all. In real life Vaughn dies.
In real life Vaughn discovers the sham for himself–a childhood seeming full of light and brightness suddenly slammed shut into a dungeon. And all will be Fucking Black for ME FOREVER.
I will poke my head out on my own terms from time to time But my real life will be in the dark. Totally black. I scorn this childish hope of brightness and light.
I’m glad the days will begin to shorten on Monday. I crave the LONG starry nights.
Vaughn's Mom 