W0rld

29 September 2015

Vaughn–

I haven’t written to you for a long time. I don’t do it because it hurts. Not to write to you, but to bring the reality of your not being…what to say…’here’? ‘in this world’?

But I feel you are here. I feel you are part of the world –the world that is your home, my darling.

So I will say ‘not on this planet’, woo woo or not as it may sound.

This is the thing: even though I may see ‘you’ again, it will be your eternal soul. Which is cool, I guess, but I want Vaughn, the human boy who came through my body. The dear, lively little boy who grew up into a beautiful, kind, and sensitive young man.

I want to hear your voice. My human ears and human arms and human eyes long for you.

If what I’m learning about is true, my soul will vibrate with indescribable joy at reconnecting with your soul. And I find that comforting. But that doesn’t change these human years stretching out in front of me. All of them missing a piece. That will be my human life and I can’t change it.

I love you my darling. I hope you somehow hear me.